fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck

   Damn, there are just some days when everything locks up, shuts down and refuses to come out.I think It was Bulowski who said something about, if you have to sit in front of the keyboard for hours and force it, don't do it.
Well, it'd been that kind of run.
  Why does it happen? Who the hell knows? Maybe it's terminal grey skies and storms, a lover that doesn't call, a cat that pukes on the floor and you find out by stepping in it, or too many experiments gone bad and and dishes and pans and crap all over the kitchen and and a sticky floor...
And nobody giving a rat's ass. Sometimes a girl is too tired to care about the dirty dishes in the kitchen sink. And yes, I love Annie Lennox, ....
   I'm thinking school work piled up and it's all ready the close of the quarter and I'm frustrated by their up and down down performances,with very little time to go.Some times practicals go well , but there are days when it's all shit.......Like nothing stuck from one day to the next......hello, memory? What do you not understand......it's all about the formula, then taking your time and watching your temperature. No two ovens are alike. No two ovens are equal. And not all recipes are good for convection ovens, if you don't know how to adjust. And if you don't pay attention to the yield, you are gonna wind up with a result you don't expect. Or want. So damn it, read it, see it in your mind, think it out. Stop running around looking for things you need. Mise en place! Get everything you need first, all the ingredients, the tools, the pans. This ain't a box of Duncan Hines! This is real, from scratch and takes some thought. Don't tell me you can't find "it", when I can go in and put my hand on it without looking and you were just there for something else, in front of it! Puleeeeezzzzeee! Read the recipe first, read the procedure next, gather up everything , then proceed.
   Instructors get frustrated too. It's not that I think I'm holy, holy. There's a reason I'm doing it. A need and desire to see people who are spending their money on an education, get the best that can be given. Why would you not want to grasp the concept? There has to be a point where, "just getting a passing grade," is not enough.When you stop thinking,"well I'm not gonna do this full time, it's just a course requirement". This is not a soft business you that you are working towards entering. This is a balls out, dog eat dog industry and if you have any doubts, read a trade rag and see how many open and close in a year. Everything is a requirement!      Everything is a weapon in your arsenal of abilities. Everything you learn is one more tactic to insure your advancement in your career. Dessert is the last thing people remember, it finishes the experience,ergo if it sucks.the whole evening is blown.
  I knew a place that barely got it's doors open, only to close in 3 months.3MONTHS!!...the planning, the work, the effort, the investment.....down the drain. Snap the fuck out of it!
 . Fine, it's not ALL their fault. I, have, unfortunately, that there are discrepancies in some areas. It's as tho some things have not been totally tested before printing the book, or edited with exclusions. If that doesn't mess with you, nothing will. BUT......if you go over everything first, and I do give plenty of time to review, then something should scream "WRONG".......and, call me to you, to look at it....and we'll figure a way to fix it. If you get me after the fact, all we can do is assess what went wrong, scrape it in the trash and begin a new. This is part of the learning process. I learned, you will too. Nobody is born with this. And yes, I expect to study on your own. It's not automatic.You need to do somethings by yourself.
  I spent two very long yrs.doing it over and over again, from 10:00 at night till 6:00 in the morning, often alone, getting items ready for opening, to meet the demands. I would start with the yeast breads to allow for rising and proofing times, work some cakes in between, maybe a pie, then as the breads went in to bake, gather ingredients for the quick breads and morning coffee. One item would be left to do which would signal the end. God, it felt like completing a marathon. Everyday. 6-7 days a week.
  It takes rigid discipline.........which, I think today, is sadly lacking; sheer will, and a desire to produce the best, your best. If you thought this would be a piece of cake, you were sadly mistaken. It takes sacrifice. And tenacity. You ..karate kid, me...Mr Miagi..........focus, open your mind and senses........be prepared for the unexpected.
   And , now for something completely different........

Chocolate Soufflé

3- egg yolks
2 3/4- oz sugar
dash of vanilla or a vanilla bean, split and scraped
2 3/4-oz of all purpose flour
1 cup-milk
1 oz-unsweetened chocolate
2 cups-egg whites (about  6 egg whites)

Set oven at 375 degrees
Butter and sugar 6, 4-5oz soufflé cups
 
  Mix the yolks with half the sugar and vanilla.Add flour, stirring till a smooth paste forms. (If using a bean add to milk while heating in next step)
  Heat milk slowly to a boil,careful not to scorch.This is when you add the bean scrapings and pod to steep.Remove pod
  Melt chocolate in a small bowl over warm water or in microwave in 15 second bursts, stirring to prevent burning.
  Add the yolk mixture to the milk for a 2-3 minutes. Use a whisk to mix. Then use a wooden spatula to stir till the paste no longer sticks to the sides.
  Put the paste in an electric mixing bowl and beat, not whip, for 10-15 minutes.Add the chocolate and mix well. Scrape into a bowl to cool
  Clean mixing bowl thoroughly and dry.Whip the egg whites with a dash of salt, till meringue-like peaks form, Gradually add remaining sugar and beat till stiff. The whites should not slide if the the bowl is tipped.
 Fold the whites into the paste in 1/4 increments till well combined.Spoon into prepared soufflé cups
 Bake 15 minutes in a lower 1/3 of oven
 Serve with powdered sugar and maybe a Chantilly whipped cream
This will double batch nicely, if you need it.

And then who cares if it rains, the phone doesn't ring, and the dishes don't get washed.................... as for the cat................well you're on your own.

As always,
Cheffy



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